1
00:00:10,517 --> 00:00:13,657
Bubble, bubble, toil and trouble!
2
00:00:14,118 --> 00:00:17,301
Tell me the ponies
and the daily double~
3
00:00:17,981 --> 00:00:19,421
Now, now, Mama.
4
00:00:19,707 --> 00:00:21,901
You know you're not allowed
to go to the track, anymore.
5
00:00:22,617 --> 00:00:25,542
Poisoned one triple
crown contender,
6
00:00:25,567 --> 00:00:27,901
and everyone gets
their shorts in a knot.
7
00:00:28,275 --> 00:00:30,021
Now where the heck is Gomez?
8
00:00:30,295 --> 00:00:31,788
I have to start dinner.
9
00:00:34,333 --> 00:00:35,821
That sounds like him, now.
10
00:00:40,769 --> 00:00:41,870
Fantastic!
11
00:00:41,895 --> 00:00:43,544
It's like shooting
fish in a barrel.
12
00:00:43,697 --> 00:00:45,951
You are shooting
fish in a barrel.
13
00:00:54,760 --> 00:00:56,206
Nervous little
critters, aren't they?
14
00:00:59,557 --> 00:01:01,052
We bring the catch of the day!
15
00:01:01,077 --> 00:01:03,861
Well, don't come in
before the eyes go bad.
16
00:01:06,310 --> 00:01:07,489
Here you go!
17
00:01:08,309 --> 00:01:10,012
Oh, they look so tasty!
18
00:01:12,395 --> 00:01:14,887
As Gomez is suave,
19
00:01:15,575 --> 00:01:17,421
as Fester is frightening,
20
00:01:17,770 --> 00:01:19,848
to cook up these suckers
21
00:01:20,184 --> 00:01:24,022
please bring me some lightning~!
22
00:01:26,357 --> 00:01:29,099
Ah, bouillabaisse fit for a King!
23
00:01:29,318 --> 00:01:30,571
Or more importantly,
24
00:01:30,755 --> 00:01:31,778
his Queen.
25
00:01:32,392 --> 00:01:36,072
Gomez, darling, d'you think it's true
that bouillabaisse is the food of love?
26
00:01:36,174 --> 00:01:37,529
For us, my darling,
27
00:01:37,553 --> 00:01:38,701
of course!
28
00:01:39,539 --> 00:01:40,742
For the red snapper?
29
00:01:41,181 --> 00:01:42,181
Not so much.
30
00:01:49,326 --> 00:01:51,240
♪ Welcome to the Addams family ♪
31
00:01:51,306 --> 00:01:53,273
♪ How you do, the
Addams family? ♪
32
00:01:53,305 --> 00:01:55,145
♪ Come into the Addams family ♪
33
00:01:55,287 --> 00:01:55,863
Now!
34
00:01:55,977 --> 00:01:57,130
Chachacha!
*snap snap*
35
00:01:57,201 --> 00:01:58,858
♪ Wonderfully scary ♪
36
00:01:58,930 --> 00:02:00,865
♪ And pleasantly hairy ♪
37
00:02:01,039 --> 00:02:02,814
♪ Delightfully?
Very. ♪
38
00:02:02,995 --> 00:02:04,402
♪ It's the Addams family! ♪
39
00:02:04,481 --> 00:02:04,928
*snap snap*
40
00:02:04,988 --> 00:02:07,148
♪ Welcome to the Addams family ♪
41
00:02:07,173 --> 00:02:09,175
♪ Come into the Addams family ♪
42
00:02:09,200 --> 00:02:11,274
♪ Come into the Addams family ♪
43
00:02:11,324 --> 00:02:11,900
Now!
44
00:02:12,014 --> 00:02:13,145
Chachacha!
*snap snap*
45
00:02:15,088 --> 00:02:16,661
It's very simple, children.
46
00:02:16,686 --> 00:02:18,463
All you need is 20/20 vision,
47
00:02:18,501 --> 00:02:21,101
nerves of steel, and some
ridiculously overpriced footwear.
48
00:02:33,940 --> 00:02:35,261
Swish~!
49
00:02:35,810 --> 00:02:37,381
Bravo, darling.
50
00:02:37,724 --> 00:02:38,568
May I try?
51
00:02:38,607 --> 00:02:40,061
But, of course, querida~
52
00:02:41,443 --> 00:02:42,421
Thank you, Lurch.
53
00:02:57,646 --> 00:02:59,146
Nothing but net!
54
00:03:00,256 --> 00:03:02,821
They don't call you "Air"
Addams for the heck of it.
55
00:03:03,425 --> 00:03:04,609
That's all, children.
56
00:03:04,703 --> 00:03:06,061
That's the lesson for today.
57
00:03:06,209 --> 00:03:07,341
Thanks, Father.
58
00:03:07,964 --> 00:03:09,861
Come to the dungeon, Pugsley.
59
00:03:09,993 --> 00:03:12,381
So we can practice
your "hang" time.
60
00:03:15,008 --> 00:03:17,621
Isn't it lovely that the
children play so well together?
61
00:03:17,993 --> 00:03:19,421
As do we, darling.
62
00:03:19,784 --> 00:03:20,747
Did you say "oui"?
63
00:03:20,943 --> 00:03:22,376
Sometimes that's
French, you know.
64
00:03:25,015 --> 00:03:27,501
There you go, overcompensating again.
65
00:03:27,861 --> 00:03:28,861
What was that, old man?
66
00:03:28,886 --> 00:03:30,232
According to
this article I read,
67
00:03:30,256 --> 00:03:31,741
you two should be miserable.
68
00:03:32,009 --> 00:03:33,421
What article is that, Fester?
69
00:03:34,035 --> 00:03:35,934
In this month's Psychobabble Today,
70
00:03:35,968 --> 00:03:40,021
there's an article called "The Dangers
of a Happy Marriage" by Dr. Pierre LeBlanc.
71
00:03:40,118 --> 00:03:41,661
If our marriage is dangerous,
72
00:03:42,378 --> 00:03:45,541
I'm prepared to dance on the
edge of doom for all eternity.
73
00:03:46,239 --> 00:03:47,421
Music, Lurch!
74
00:03:48,041 --> 00:03:50,501
To underscore this magical moment.
75
00:03:51,864 --> 00:03:53,621
You don't understand.
76
00:03:54,036 --> 00:03:56,221
This doctor really
knows his stuff.
77
00:03:57,547 --> 00:03:59,779
He's French, for goodness sake!
78
00:03:59,804 --> 00:04:00,908
You may be onto something.
79
00:04:00,932 --> 00:04:02,581
If there's one thing the French know about,
80
00:04:02,606 --> 00:04:03,756
it's l'amour~
81
00:04:03,781 --> 00:04:05,849
Nonsense, I'm sure
you mean well, Fester.
82
00:04:06,115 --> 00:04:08,581
But Gomez and I
couldn't be happier.
83
00:04:08,606 --> 00:04:10,341
Well, Dr. LeBlanc
doesn't think so,
84
00:04:10,366 --> 00:04:11,334
and neither do I.
85
00:04:12,163 --> 00:04:13,449
He says that to be happy,
86
00:04:13,473 --> 00:04:15,181
you have to fight sometimes.
87
00:04:15,294 --> 00:04:15,981
You know,
88
00:04:16,091 --> 00:04:17,287
mix it up a little bit.
89
00:04:17,390 --> 00:04:20,390
Well, as much as I'd like to stay
and pursue this rational line of thought,
90
00:04:20,415 --> 00:04:22,329
I'm due at the
National Cigar Society.
91
00:04:22,353 --> 00:04:23,541
It's Macanudo Night.
92
00:04:23,732 --> 00:04:25,021
Have fun, dear.
93
00:04:26,122 --> 00:04:26,821
I'm off.
94
00:04:29,495 --> 00:04:31,013
I'm serious, Morticia.
95
00:04:31,045 --> 00:04:33,508
If you and Gomez don't
start airing your problems,
96
00:04:33,663 --> 00:04:34,501
they're just going to,
97
00:04:34,633 --> 00:04:35,795
pardon the expression,
98
00:04:35,974 --> 00:04:36,781
fester.
99
00:04:43,105 --> 00:04:44,381
Tighter, Lurch!
100
00:04:44,444 --> 00:04:47,187
How am I gonna get a tension
headache without the proper tension?
101
00:04:47,212 --> 00:04:50,676
Would you like me to whip up
some of my famous Headache Potion?
102
00:04:50,701 --> 00:04:51,733
No, thanks.
103
00:04:51,758 --> 00:04:53,604
I want my head firmly attached,
104
00:04:53,628 --> 00:04:55,421
what with the Gomez
and Morticia crisis.
105
00:04:56,298 --> 00:04:59,381
Do you really think this shrink
knows what he's talking about?
106
00:04:59,406 --> 00:05:00,861
Of course he does.
107
00:05:01,101 --> 00:05:01,804
I tell ya,
108
00:05:01,829 --> 00:05:04,453
if Gomez and Morticia don't
start blowing off a little steam,
109
00:05:04,478 --> 00:05:06,781
their marriage is headed
straight for Splitsville.
110
00:05:06,867 --> 00:05:08,581
And we'll be orphans.
111
00:05:08,606 --> 00:05:09,941
Then we've got to do something.
112
00:05:09,966 --> 00:05:10,661
I know.
113
00:05:11,040 --> 00:05:12,172
We work together.
114
00:05:12,468 --> 00:05:15,408
We can get them into a
knockdown drag-out fight.
115
00:05:15,470 --> 00:05:17,461
Then they'll yell and scream.
116
00:05:17,531 --> 00:05:19,101
And kiss and make up.
117
00:05:19,189 --> 00:05:22,701
We'll give them the gift of an emotional
rollercoaster called Marriage.
118
00:05:22,805 --> 00:05:23,621
Everyone in?
119
00:05:23,646 --> 00:05:24,461
I am.
120
00:05:25,291 --> 00:05:27,102
Rollercoaster.
121
00:05:27,984 --> 00:05:28,621
Thing?
122
00:05:30,243 --> 00:05:33,581
Then 'Operation: Blow Up'
is now in progress.
123
00:05:41,227 --> 00:05:42,209
Oh, no.
124
00:05:42,233 --> 00:05:43,421
I'm choking.
125
00:05:49,826 --> 00:05:50,741
Oh, dear.
126
00:05:54,424 --> 00:05:55,704
Hang in there, old man!
127
00:05:59,055 --> 00:06:00,019
Thank you, Gomez.
128
00:06:00,043 --> 00:06:01,021
That was close.
129
00:06:01,164 --> 00:06:01,769
No problem.
130
00:06:01,793 --> 00:06:03,421
Whatever were you
choking on, Fester?
131
00:06:03,688 --> 00:06:04,694
A halogen bulb.
132
00:06:04,866 --> 00:06:05,558
I tell you,
133
00:06:05,582 --> 00:06:07,741
those 300 watts are killers.
134
00:06:08,098 --> 00:06:10,821
Tish, how is it possible
Fester's still single?
135
00:06:15,140 --> 00:06:16,421
Morticia, my pet.
136
00:06:17,792 --> 00:06:18,649
You didn't,
137
00:06:18,673 --> 00:06:19,671
perchance,
138
00:06:20,661 --> 00:06:22,301
rearrange the board just now?
139
00:06:22,820 --> 00:06:23,400
... Did you?
140
00:06:23,549 --> 00:06:25,369
Gomez, my darling.
141
00:06:25,565 --> 00:06:26,940
You're not accusing
me of fudging.
142
00:06:27,396 --> 00:06:29,222
Forgive me, amorita mia.
143
00:06:29,284 --> 00:06:30,737
Of course, not.
144
00:06:35,061 --> 00:06:36,928
My King stalemates your King.
145
00:06:36,952 --> 00:06:37,928
It's a draw!
146
00:06:38,343 --> 00:06:39,901
Neither of us wins.
147
00:06:40,285 --> 00:06:41,501
It had to be.
148
00:06:42,229 --> 00:06:44,940
We are so perfectly
matched, my love.
149
00:06:48,731 --> 00:06:51,101
I do so feel like dressing
up for dinner tonight.
150
00:06:51,727 --> 00:06:53,202
But I can't decide
between these two.
151
00:06:53,265 --> 00:06:53,757
Mama?
152
00:06:54,192 --> 00:06:55,101
Well,
153
00:06:55,126 --> 00:06:57,616
I wouldn't wear
that one if I were you.
154
00:06:57,641 --> 00:06:59,181
Definitely not that one.
155
00:07:00,279 --> 00:07:00,827
Why?
156
00:07:01,179 --> 00:07:02,085
That's the one,
157
00:07:02,110 --> 00:07:03,601
Gomez says,
158
00:07:03,626 --> 00:07:04,936
makes you look fat.
159
00:07:05,740 --> 00:07:06,740
Gomez said that?
160
00:07:06,811 --> 00:07:07,983
Yes, he did.
161
00:07:08,008 --> 00:07:08,621
Really?
162
00:07:12,051 --> 00:07:13,781
Perhaps I should have
a word with Gomez.
163
00:07:13,973 --> 00:07:15,341
Excuse me, won't you?
164
00:07:26,604 --> 00:07:28,941
Well, I guess I could always
learn to sleep sitting up!
165
00:07:29,498 --> 00:07:30,301
Gomez?
166
00:07:30,851 --> 00:07:31,581
Yes, querida?
167
00:07:32,167 --> 00:07:34,647
Is it possible that you think
I'm gaining weight on my...
168
00:07:35,122 --> 00:07:35,941
... derrière?
169
00:07:36,754 --> 00:07:37,176
Tish!
170
00:07:37,527 --> 00:07:38,261
That's French!
171
00:07:42,368 --> 00:07:43,289
Please, Gomez.
172
00:07:43,398 --> 00:07:44,621
Do you think I'm gaining weight?
173
00:07:44,899 --> 00:07:45,929
I certainly hope so.
174
00:07:46,257 --> 00:07:47,484
Then there'd be
more of you to love.
175
00:07:47,879 --> 00:07:49,461
Oh, darling.
176
00:07:52,504 --> 00:07:54,301
Great idea, Mama.
177
00:07:54,638 --> 00:07:56,598
You got a better one, Sparky?
178
00:07:56,944 --> 00:07:58,328
Well, not at the moment.
179
00:07:58,640 --> 00:08:00,168
But I'll think of something.
180
00:08:01,046 --> 00:08:02,766
Have I ever let you down before?
181
00:08:03,883 --> 00:08:05,261
Okay, since lunch?
182
00:08:06,054 --> 00:08:07,180
What about this?
183
00:08:07,541 --> 00:08:10,021
We put gunpowder
in Gomez's cigar.
184
00:08:10,302 --> 00:08:12,070
When it blows up in his face,
185
00:08:12,094 --> 00:08:13,802
we'll tell him that
Morticia did it.
186
00:08:14,049 --> 00:08:14,889
You forget.
187
00:08:15,178 --> 00:08:16,341
He likes that.
188
00:08:16,473 --> 00:08:17,261
Oh, right.
189
00:08:21,411 --> 00:08:22,501
Fester, here.
190
00:08:22,981 --> 00:08:23,668
Gomez?
191
00:08:24,014 --> 00:08:25,221
May I ask who's calling?
192
00:08:26,771 --> 00:08:28,781
The National Cigar Society?
193
00:08:29,922 --> 00:08:30,922
Just a minute.
194
00:08:31,565 --> 00:08:32,381
No, wait.
195
00:08:33,540 --> 00:08:37,421
Gomez told me to tell you that his
wife insists he quit your stupid club.
196
00:08:37,918 --> 00:08:40,141
And he wants you to
pay him back his dues.
197
00:08:41,000 --> 00:08:42,249
What can I say?
198
00:08:42,273 --> 00:08:44,341
She wears the pants around here.
199
00:08:47,059 --> 00:08:48,581
Now you've done it.
200
00:08:48,871 --> 00:08:51,613
Gomez loves the
National Cigar Society.
201
00:08:51,638 --> 00:08:53,504
He'll blow his top!
202
00:08:53,529 --> 00:08:56,106
Awooooooo!
203
00:08:59,585 --> 00:09:00,550
Yes?
204
00:09:00,575 --> 00:09:03,541
I demand to see Gomez Adams.
205
00:09:07,360 --> 00:09:08,341
You are?
206
00:09:08,972 --> 00:09:11,215
I am Fidel Cojiba,
207
00:09:11,429 --> 00:09:14,301
the President of the
National Cigar Society.
208
00:09:14,735 --> 00:09:16,341
Follow, me.
209
00:09:17,033 --> 00:09:18,421
President Cojiba.
210
00:09:19,403 --> 00:09:20,181
Fidel!
211
00:09:20,699 --> 00:09:22,278
What brings you to our
humble abode?
212
00:09:22,303 --> 00:09:23,668
Mr. Addams.
213
00:09:23,911 --> 00:09:26,901
I have a cheque to cover
the full refund of your dues.
214
00:09:27,230 --> 00:09:28,101
But why?
215
00:09:30,100 --> 00:09:32,209
Well, perhaps your wife
can explain that to you.
216
00:09:32,233 --> 00:09:33,821
The one with the pants.
217
00:09:34,066 --> 00:09:36,529
I figured Morticia
had a hand in this.
218
00:09:36,553 --> 00:09:37,511
Who else?
219
00:09:38,383 --> 00:09:39,156
She said,
220
00:09:39,180 --> 00:09:41,421
the society was stupid.
221
00:09:41,446 --> 00:09:42,581
She did?
222
00:09:42,871 --> 00:09:43,895
Then it must be.
223
00:09:44,059 --> 00:09:45,254
Sorry, old pal.
224
00:09:45,279 --> 00:09:46,629
I'll take that cheque now.
225
00:09:47,195 --> 00:09:49,061
And don't even think
about coming back.
226
00:09:49,237 --> 00:09:51,250
Your inability to
control your wife,
227
00:09:51,274 --> 00:09:54,749
impunes the integrity of all the
real men in the society.
228
00:09:55,801 --> 00:09:56,661
Good night.
229
00:10:00,389 --> 00:10:01,187
Nice fellow.
230
00:10:01,266 --> 00:10:02,501
A little tightly wound, though.
231
00:10:02,739 --> 00:10:03,701
Darling,
232
00:10:04,020 --> 00:10:05,559
did I hear a strange voice?
233
00:10:05,727 --> 00:10:06,501
Indeed.
234
00:10:06,769 --> 00:10:08,061
It was the voice in my head.
235
00:10:08,621 --> 00:10:12,061
And it's telling me I spent far too
much time at the National Cigar Society.
236
00:10:13,467 --> 00:10:15,667
It's also telling me we must
do more things together.
237
00:10:15,957 --> 00:10:16,901
Splendid.
238
00:10:16,926 --> 00:10:18,184
Perhaps another honeymoon.
239
00:10:18,209 --> 00:10:19,421
Capital idea!
240
00:10:19,629 --> 00:10:20,824
Let's look into Bosnia.
241
00:10:25,337 --> 00:10:27,381
Nice work, forehead.
242
00:10:27,721 --> 00:10:29,329
Oh, this is not over.
243
00:10:29,769 --> 00:10:32,529
Desperate situations call
for desperate measures.
244
00:10:32,871 --> 00:10:34,621
And I, have a plan.
245
00:10:41,882 --> 00:10:42,851
"Dr. LeBlanc."
246
00:10:42,876 --> 00:10:45,009
"There's a Mr. Fester
Addams on the line,
247
00:10:45,033 --> 00:10:46,351
he says it's an emergency."
248
00:10:46,429 --> 00:10:47,484
Isn't it always?
249
00:10:47,722 --> 00:10:48,495
Put him through.
250
00:10:50,869 --> 00:10:51,541
Pierre LeBlanc.
251
00:10:51,618 --> 00:10:52,415
Dr. LeBlanc?
252
00:10:52,454 --> 00:10:53,735
Have I got a problem for you.
253
00:10:53,806 --> 00:10:56,261
I just read your article and I think
you're the only one that can help.
254
00:10:56,286 --> 00:10:57,421
You're an astute man.
255
00:10:57,564 --> 00:10:59,532
What makes
you think that you have marriage troubles?
256
00:10:59,653 --> 00:11:01,661
Oh, it's not me. It's
my brother and his wife.
257
00:11:01,686 --> 00:11:03,024
They're happy all the time.
258
00:11:02,901 --> 00:11:05,741
Ah, a recipe for disaster.
259
00:11:05,920 --> 00:11:07,842
I've had five
marriages of my own.
260
00:11:08,101 --> 00:11:10,621
Each one blissfully
ideal, and then poof!
261
00:11:10,646 --> 00:11:11,569
Five marriages?
262
00:11:11,593 --> 00:11:13,021
You must really
understand women.
263
00:11:13,046 --> 00:11:14,462
Oh, I adore them.
264
00:11:14,486 --> 00:11:16,301
I've dured three men for women!
265
00:11:16,326 --> 00:11:17,357
A true romantic.
266
00:11:17,382 --> 00:11:19,221
Then you must help Gomez
and Morticia.
267
00:11:19,349 --> 00:11:21,037
Please come to the
house and observe them.
268
00:11:21,062 --> 00:11:22,420
But don't let them
know you're a doctor.
269
00:11:22,445 --> 00:11:23,678
Tell him you're a friend of mine.
270
00:11:24,084 --> 00:11:25,781
That would be
unethical.
271
00:11:25,974 --> 00:11:28,661
I'm sorry, you'll have to excuse me.
I have another phone call.
272
00:11:28,686 --> 00:11:33,141
But we can't let a beautiful woman like
Morticia go through life as a lonely divorcée.
273
00:11:33,166 --> 00:11:34,741
Beautiful, did you say?
274
00:11:34,766 --> 00:11:35,857
Exquisite.
275
00:11:36,140 --> 00:11:39,501
Ah, well, after all, I have my
professional obligation.
276
00:11:40,896 --> 00:11:41,560
Bye-bye.
277
00:11:43,149 --> 00:11:44,501
What's that you're sewing, Mama?
278
00:11:44,668 --> 00:11:47,701
Oh, it's a little idea
I've been working on.
279
00:11:47,771 --> 00:11:48,611
I call it,
280
00:11:48,635 --> 00:11:50,060
a "discomforter."
281
00:11:50,085 --> 00:11:51,861
How very cutting edge.
282
00:11:52,053 --> 00:11:53,092
That's the plan!
283
00:11:54,150 --> 00:11:55,541
Fester, friend.
284
00:11:56,241 --> 00:11:58,261
Oh, LeBlanc!
Ol' buddy, ol pal!
285
00:11:58,630 --> 00:12:00,731
You must be Morticia.
286
00:12:01,989 --> 00:12:03,052
Enchantée~
287
00:12:03,756 --> 00:12:04,603
It's French,
288
00:12:04,627 --> 00:12:05,771
and I don't care who says it.
289
00:12:06,628 --> 00:12:08,421
Yes, the French are so suave,
290
00:12:08,566 --> 00:12:11,861
but the Castilian so much more
exciting in his ardour~
291
00:12:13,173 --> 00:12:15,581
Mama, this is Fester's friend,
Monsieur LeBlanc.
292
00:12:15,747 --> 00:12:19,101
My, you are dashing.
293
00:12:20,612 --> 00:12:21,612
Thank you.
294
00:12:23,302 --> 00:12:25,849
Ah, what an unusual quilt.
295
00:12:26,178 --> 00:12:27,178
What is it made of?
296
00:12:28,029 --> 00:12:30,461
I see you found the machete.
297
00:12:31,256 --> 00:12:32,974
Shall we retire to the den?
298
00:12:32,999 --> 00:12:34,021
But, of course.
299
00:12:34,295 --> 00:12:35,990
So much more intime.
300
00:12:37,345 --> 00:12:38,889
Can you take it
easy with the French?
301
00:12:39,210 --> 00:12:40,661
I'm feeling a little
conflicted here.
302
00:12:43,438 --> 00:12:44,478
Allow me.
303
00:12:44,771 --> 00:12:46,209
Why, thank you.
304
00:12:46,719 --> 00:12:48,689
I'll give Lurch a
hand in the kitchen.
305
00:12:48,962 --> 00:12:50,581
Thing? To the kitchen.
306
00:12:57,411 --> 00:13:00,646
I don't mind saying that from
the moment I let my eyes on you,
307
00:13:01,490 --> 00:13:02,998
I was transfixed.
308
00:13:04,423 --> 00:13:07,501
I find you totally captivating, Morticia.
309
00:13:08,522 --> 00:13:09,812
Monsieur LeBlanc.
310
00:13:09,846 --> 00:13:11,901
I do believe you are
abusing our hospitality.
311
00:13:12,146 --> 00:13:13,740
I happen to be happily married.
312
00:13:13,765 --> 00:13:15,821
Well, I don't mean to brag,
313
00:13:16,013 --> 00:13:19,170
but I've made women forget
their husbands, in one day.
314
00:13:19,357 --> 00:13:20,806
Please, I love Gomez.
315
00:13:20,830 --> 00:13:22,021
Who is Gomez?
316
00:13:22,107 --> 00:13:22,943
My husband.
317
00:13:22,968 --> 00:13:23,701
You see?
318
00:13:25,373 --> 00:13:27,428
I've already forgotten him.
319
00:13:29,261 --> 00:13:29,981
Excuse me.
320
00:13:35,480 --> 00:13:36,381
Men,
321
00:13:37,607 --> 00:13:40,193
some of you will not be
coming back from this mission.
322
00:13:42,821 --> 00:13:44,333
Gomez, we got trouble!
323
00:13:44,358 --> 00:13:45,369
I certainly hope so.
324
00:13:45,393 --> 00:13:46,461
You don't understand.
325
00:13:46,596 --> 00:13:49,841
Morticia and LeBlanc are getting
pretty cozy out there on the couch.
326
00:13:49,882 --> 00:13:51,865
No wonder. I just had
the spings ripped out.
327
00:13:51,890 --> 00:13:52,865
Listen to me.
328
00:13:52,890 --> 00:13:54,662
He's trying to break
up your marriage.
329
00:13:54,687 --> 00:13:57,021
You got to get out there
and straighten Morticia out.
330
00:13:57,217 --> 00:13:59,739
I can't believe my darling querida
would even look at another man!
331
00:14:00,193 --> 00:14:01,513
It must be that cad.
332
00:14:01,941 --> 00:14:03,861
I go now to defend
the Addams' honour!
333
00:14:15,075 --> 00:14:17,603
Mr. Addams, your charming wife...
334
00:14:17,205 --> 00:14:18,301
I will not hear of it!
335
00:14:18,457 --> 00:14:20,221
You, sir, have trifled
with my marriage.
336
00:14:24,960 --> 00:14:26,141
Choose your weapons.
337
00:14:29,235 --> 00:14:31,381
These rapiers, in one hour.
338
00:14:31,406 --> 00:14:32,809
I was thinking silly string,
339
00:14:32,833 --> 00:14:33,821
but you're the guest!
340
00:14:34,171 --> 00:14:37,343
You will rue the day that
you crossed swords with Pierre LeBlanc!
341
00:14:37,108 --> 00:14:37,917
Not to worry.
342
00:14:37,941 --> 00:14:39,101
I am an Addams, sir.
343
00:14:39,126 --> 00:14:40,179
We live to rue.
344
00:14:50,781 --> 00:14:52,573
Thomas, what are you doing?
345
00:14:52,598 --> 00:14:54,329
Watch very carefully, Fester,
346
00:14:54,915 --> 00:14:58,261
as I slice this candle,
clean in half.
347
00:15:19,164 --> 00:15:20,742
... Uwahhhh.
348
00:15:55,900 --> 00:15:57,061
Poor Gomez,
349
00:15:57,086 --> 00:15:59,140
that guy's gonna turn
him into a hackysack.
350
00:15:59,405 --> 00:16:00,541
I'm afraid you're right.
351
00:16:00,871 --> 00:16:02,605
As much as I adore a good duel,
352
00:16:02,723 --> 00:16:05,305
it pains me to think of life
without my beloved Gomez.
353
00:16:05,805 --> 00:16:06,616
Fester,
354
00:16:07,132 --> 00:16:08,741
you've got to
put a stop to this.
355
00:16:09,700 --> 00:16:10,781
I don't know.
356
00:16:11,074 --> 00:16:13,425
I seem to be much
better at starting things.
357
00:16:13,496 --> 00:16:14,206
Haha!
358
00:16:23,403 --> 00:16:24,536
How's it going?
359
00:16:24,581 --> 00:16:25,165
Splendid,
360
00:16:25,189 --> 00:16:26,701
I hope I have collision on this.
361
00:16:26,889 --> 00:16:29,505
I just checked with the
cemetery and it's really full.
362
00:16:29,530 --> 00:16:30,958
There's no room for Pierre.
363
00:16:30,983 --> 00:16:33,143
So, I guess you're gonna
have to call off the duel.
364
00:16:33,360 --> 00:16:34,181
Nonsense.
365
00:16:34,254 --> 00:16:36,715
I'll just move Uncle Milo
on top of Cousin Henrietta.
366
00:16:36,856 --> 00:16:38,141
Trust me, she won't mind.
367
00:16:38,638 --> 00:16:39,101
See?
368
00:16:39,126 --> 00:16:39,802
The secret,
369
00:16:39,827 --> 00:16:40,872
is all in the wrist.
370
00:16:41,113 --> 00:16:43,818
I guess you're going to want to
keep your wrist in shape, then.
371
00:16:43,872 --> 00:16:44,356
Here.
372
00:16:45,220 --> 00:16:46,760
Let me massage it for you.
373
00:16:48,861 --> 00:16:49,621
How's that feel?
374
00:16:49,646 --> 00:16:51,381
Like you're digging
for bone marrow.
375
00:16:52,160 --> 00:16:53,021
Keep going.
376
00:17:00,621 --> 00:17:01,901
Sorry, Gomez.
377
00:17:02,540 --> 00:17:04,548
I guess you're gonna
have to call off the duel, now.
378
00:17:05,367 --> 00:17:07,301
Not when I still have one good hand.
379
00:17:08,992 --> 00:17:10,421
Well, what do you know?
I'm ambidextrous!
380
00:17:10,446 --> 00:17:11,954
Equally skilled with both hands.
381
00:17:13,414 --> 00:17:15,141
Yeah, equally awful.
382
00:17:17,829 --> 00:17:18,840
Monsieur Leblanc,
383
00:17:19,254 --> 00:17:20,535
would you care for some tea?
384
00:17:21,567 --> 00:17:22,421
Merci.
385
00:17:22,591 --> 00:17:23,427
De rien.
386
00:17:23,569 --> 00:17:25,369
Please, Morticia, speak English.
387
00:17:25,658 --> 00:17:27,581
It sets my soul afire~
388
00:17:28,022 --> 00:17:29,360
Monsieur LeBlanc,
389
00:17:29,814 --> 00:17:31,012
about this duel.
390
00:17:31,308 --> 00:17:32,609
You'll not talk me out of it.
391
00:17:32,835 --> 00:17:34,901
In three strokes,
you'll be a widow.
392
00:17:35,521 --> 00:17:37,141
How fortunate I
look good in black.
393
00:17:37,571 --> 00:17:39,020
Well, since I cannot
talk you out of it,
394
00:17:39,045 --> 00:17:40,593
then we must plan
for our honeymoon.
395
00:17:40,800 --> 00:17:41,649
Yes.
396
00:17:41,922 --> 00:17:43,061
Where shall we go?
397
00:17:43,338 --> 00:17:44,861
Man, I've always liked Bermuda.
398
00:17:44,959 --> 00:17:46,301
Islands.
399
00:17:46,326 --> 00:17:47,221
Triangle.
400
00:17:47,395 --> 00:17:48,837
But Fester, Mama,
and the children
401
00:17:48,861 --> 00:17:50,927
have their hearts set
on an ocean cruise.
402
00:17:51,363 --> 00:17:52,221
Excuse me.
403
00:17:52,413 --> 00:17:54,541
Fester has a thing
for Kathy Lee Gifford.
404
00:17:55,077 --> 00:17:57,061
They cannot come
on our honeymoon.
405
00:17:57,256 --> 00:17:59,235
But they must.
We're the Addams.
406
00:17:59,259 --> 00:18:00,276
We're inseparable.
407
00:18:00,374 --> 00:18:02,621
And with Gomez gone,
we'll have to stick together.
408
00:18:02,958 --> 00:18:03,763
And to you.
409
00:18:04,427 --> 00:18:06,901
This is not exactly what I had in mind.
410
00:18:08,252 --> 00:18:09,341
Don't worry, darling.
411
00:18:10,075 --> 00:18:12,036
In a few years,
they'll grow on you.
412
00:18:13,091 --> 00:18:14,216
Like a fungus.
413
00:18:17,140 --> 00:18:20,120
You know, maybe this whole
duel business is a bit impetuous.
414
00:18:20,751 --> 00:18:23,861
And I suddenly remembered
my 'Fear of Intimacy' meeting in...
415
00:18:24,075 --> 00:18:25,239
Oh my, I'm late.
416
00:18:25,571 --> 00:18:27,649
Say goodbye to your
lovely husband for me.
417
00:18:28,164 --> 00:18:29,473
He's a lucky man.
418
00:18:32,073 --> 00:18:33,333
And I'm a lucky woman.
419
00:18:33,366 --> 00:18:34,381
Where is he?
420
00:18:34,466 --> 00:18:36,575
\ I'll cut his heart
out and wear it on my sleeve.
421
00:18:37,077 --> 00:18:39,369
You're too late,
my love. He just left.
422
00:18:39,433 --> 00:18:41,221
I'm afraid he turned
out to be a coward.
423
00:18:41,398 --> 00:18:42,422
He was afraid of me.
424
00:18:42,446 --> 00:18:43,381
I knew it!
425
00:18:43,769 --> 00:18:44,769
Yes, darling.
426
00:18:45,042 --> 00:18:47,341
He was very, very afraid.
427
00:18:48,085 --> 00:18:48,981
Oh, Tish.
428
00:18:49,567 --> 00:18:51,958
I'd be lying if I
wasn't a little disappointed.
429
00:18:53,300 --> 00:18:56,480
I find the idea of potentially
dying for you incredibly romantic.
430
00:18:56,575 --> 00:18:58,177
You always do.
431
00:18:58,272 --> 00:18:59,849
You're absolutely
right, querida.
432
00:19:00,067 --> 00:19:01,541
I must become less predictable.
433
00:19:02,456 --> 00:19:03,102
Dance?
434
00:19:04,979 --> 00:19:05,741
Tango?
435
00:19:06,044 --> 00:19:07,219
Not tonight, my love.
436
00:19:07,629 --> 00:19:08,137
Tonight,
437
00:19:08,489 --> 00:19:09,661
we get jiggy.
438
00:19:41,589 --> 00:19:44,581
William Tell shot an
apple off his son's head.
439
00:19:44,933 --> 00:19:46,621
Could you pass me the
moonblock, my love?
440
00:19:46,646 --> 00:19:48,461
I believe I may have
been out here too long.
441
00:19:49,273 --> 00:19:53,381
It's so gratifying to see the children
take such a keen interest in history.
442
00:19:53,642 --> 00:19:54,786
It says here.
443
00:19:54,701 --> 00:19:55,621
Now, Fester,
444
00:19:55,934 --> 00:19:58,341
what have we decided about
you and magazine articles?
445
00:19:58,366 --> 00:19:59,181
I know,
446
00:19:59,270 --> 00:20:01,169
but I'm taking this Cosmo quiz,
447
00:20:01,194 --> 00:20:04,061
and I'm starting to think that my
love life isn't all that it could be.
448
00:20:04,086 --> 00:20:05,493
Don't be ridiculous.
449
00:20:05,672 --> 00:20:07,181
Right now, you
don't have a love life.
450
00:20:07,413 --> 00:20:08,221
Good point.
451
00:20:09,628 --> 00:20:11,101
Thanks a lot, Gomez.
452
00:20:18,543 --> 00:20:19,543
That's gotta hurt.
453
00:20:20,026 --> 00:20:23,141
And yet, such a small price
to pay for learning the classics.
454
00:20:23,410 --> 00:20:25,901
How did we become
so blessed, cara mia?
455
00:20:26,004 --> 00:20:28,261
Sometimes it's better
not to question, darling.
456
00:20:28,534 --> 00:20:32,261
Sometimes it's better just to
revel in the glory that is our love.
457
00:20:43,637 --> 00:20:46,559
Awooooo... !